The long-awaited STAR SHOWER REVEAL.
For those who missed my original post (on facebook) about my first Christmas gift this year, I’ll include it here:
We’re all familiar with social media-induced jealousy, right? You know, seemingly perfect people posting their seemingly perfect pictures of their adorable children, luxurious vacations, magazine-worthy home, gorgeous wedding, etc etc. You *want* to be happy when you see these posts in your news feed – and maybe even are! But, comparison creeps in and all of the sudden you’ve found yourself on the envy train, wishing your (fill in the blank) was more like their seemingly perfect (fill in the blank)…… WELL, I’m here to say that you can just keep riding that train on over to the Oostra abode this holiday season, because, people, WE HAVE STAR SHOWER. That’s right – I’m gloating. (And you’re probably coveting.) This here is a bona fide, multi-colored, holiday decor phenomenon (As Seen on TV) that will SHOWER my home in “thousands of laser lights in seconds!” While you poor souls brave the cold and climb your ladders to hang all those bulbs with feeble hopes that one isn’t burnt out – I will be relaxing inside my warm home, awash with an array of (seizure-inducing?) lights that are obviously the envy of all my neighbors. And just to pour salt in the jealousy-wound that you are all likely experiencing right now, I’ll be sure to post a picture of the Star Shower in action, thanks for asking. (Not pictured, but accompanying this fabulous early-Christmas package from my mother was a belated birthday card from my great aunt who has forgotten or is unaware that I’m a) married and changed my name, and b) no longer live in Illinois – but you’re probably not too envious of that, hence the parenthesis).
…And now, the much-anticipated Star Shower Light Display:
Fabulous, isn’t it? While I can’t speak to specific stats (because, I have a day-job and all), I can say with certainty that the number of cars slow-rolling by our house to admire the beauty has increased by at least 36% since we plugged in Star Shower.
Truly though, I can’t say enough about the ease of this invention. It took me all of ten minutes to: review the instruction manual (where, among other things, I was instructed to set up Star Shower at least 5 nautical miles* from an airport), find an extension cord, set the thing up, and plug it in. Now, I can’t speak to exactly how many minutes Kyle invested two days later to: ignore the instruction manual, find an OUTDOOR extension cord, wrap the extension cord and Star Shower plug-in in plastic to shield it from moisture, re-position the device, and plug it in. BUT! I can advertise with fully honesty that this thing literally took me just TEN MINUTES to set up!
So, whilst my neighbors spent their days attempting the treachery of hanging outdoor lights or troubleshooting their electronic blow-up holiday lawn ornaments, I’ve been kicking back and sipping my cider inside knowing that my home is aglow with holiday glory.
*And how, pray tell, is one supposed to be able to measure a nautical mile from my front yard to airport? Google map tells me that we’re a little over four non-nautical regular normal miles from the airport, so … I think we’re good. I mean, I haven’t heard of any plane crashes in the area in recent weeks.